Euro-Trash

Say ciao ciao to Venice!
I had to take this picture because you must notice how adorable the color off the street lamps are:)

This was my haven.

And she was my Hero.

They call her bird woman,

First of all, all the birds for some reason like flock here in this main square,

and this woman had like 8 birds on her arms at once!

I want to be her!

Shopping in the alleys of Venice:)

Yes, we both understand we look like nascar flag women with our legs doing that:)

what evs,

we're in Venice.

HO BO

aka..Gypsy:):)

she was adorable

K venice has this Fruit and Fish market every day. It literally goes for ever!!! Every type of fruit you can imagine! Seriously a paradise. You could just pick out random fruit and get a little fruit cup to eat too:) mmmmm....

Fish market= eww

behind us were the octopus.

Who in their right mind eats raw, slimy, octopus?

The Grande Canal!

Cheesin it up real good like.

Craziest stair case ever?

So, did you know that no one owns a car on Venice island? No one at all? There are no cars?

Simply remarkable.

Because Venice is built upon water, at the very beginning they didn't have holes in the ground so that when the tide rises, the water can come up....so once upon a time, the tide got higher, and all the land started to break, and warp. So thus comes the leaning tower of Venice:)

Bet you didn't know Venice had one too huh?

So this is the big opera house in Venice. It is said to be cursed because every 10 or so years it mysteriously burns down.

The dumb fools keep re building it!

But, they got smart this time, about 6 years ago when it last burnt down, and they placed a fire hydrant in front of it:)

The flowers were so colorful when we were here!

Imagine if that were your only way of transportation?

It was seriously like a fairytale. It is everything you expect Venice to be, but better:)

You better believe Carly and I were scoping out the good looking Gonadlier men ahead of time :)

We got to go in the famous Murano glass blowing shop! "The" glass blowing shop where it all orginated.

We were able to watch a demonstration of glass blowing. It was seriously the most intense thing ever! You have to be in the Murano family to be a glass blower, and you have to be taught by your father. But most importantly, it has continued generation after generation through the men of this family.

This man was a freaking stud.

An artist.

Mmmhhhm.

I was trying to become one with my fellow ancestors.

Gypsy gypsy gypsy:)

I had to take a picture of this sign.

It was on a seat in one of the ferry's that transport you from island to island.

Why don't we have these in Utah?

They don't mess around.

Meet the crab.

Mother ended his life.

Poor little guy had just barely made it upon the grounds of Venice.

A long voyage through the holes in the cement,

A lost victory.

So hear me out.

This huge storm kicked up randomly while we were in Venice, getting ready to go to dinner.

There for...

the tide started rising...

and rising...

and rising.

Untill it started to flood Venice!!!!

Literally, it started to flood Venice.

According to locals, flooding like this only takes place about 7 times a year.

So we were a part of some rare occasion! :)

We had to take our shoes off, and the water came up to mid calf in some areas!

Whether we were running through bird shi* and diseases,

it was so worth it!:)

I think im going a little cross eyed.

Whatever.

This was what we got for a salad at our restaraunt on the Canal.

Seriously?

Carly does indeed love her Phish Food.
:)

mm:)

Pweety:)

And here we are. The Grande Canal, on a romantic Gondola ride:)
What you can't see, is how many men we ( carly and I) have stashed in our Gondola.

No big deal.

Some cute old men serenading, as we floated along:)

Soooo....romantic:)

mmmm:) I think i spotted someone....

Him. The one.

He was beautiful.

And not our Gondalier:(

So we pretend that he was staring at us.

And gave him our sexy faces.

pretty good huh?;)

We realized he was probably avoiding looking at us because of all the other men on our Gondola.

So we pushed them off.

:)
Carly ain't messin around folks

The girls:)

and Alejandro.

The love birdies+ the man who almost tipped our gondola.

Cheesin it under a bridge!

Muah!!

Kiss me please you sexy gondalier.

Isn't she adorable? This is the face of a woman in love my friends.

The lights on the water were so amazing.

First words spoken by Him: "Hey soul sister."

And she was sold

Literally.

for 400 euros.

Attention family and friends.

Little do you all know, but when you notice that Carly is not home on July 4th, it is because she is engaged.

Our sexy faces did win him over.

This is the photo you will be recieving in the mail shortly of their engagement and wedding details.

Accept it, open it, embrace it,

It is not a scam:)

Goodnight Venice,

And "good night" carly and "the one"

May all your dreams come true...

Before carly went off with her man for the night,

we had to celebrate with our last...well my last...since carly is living here...taste of gelato.

It was a sad night for two reasons.

1. I lost my sister to a gondalier.

2. No more gelato

NOOOOOO:( :( :(

you see?

Happiness and sunshine on the left.

Saddness and despair on the right.

I hope you enjoy this video...I hope it brightens your day..it doesn't mine.

Ciao Ciao Italy!

And carly

Finally! We have reached Venice! We took a pleasent ferry ride to our hotel

Venice main square!! It was crazy crowded!

We have to pretend to like each other sometimes:)

and no, we arent holding hands.

ha ha

Cuuuttee:)

Mommy and daddy

Half of the kids group.

Yeah we know,

Everyone has their stunna shades on,

at least we're original ..ya dig?

GELATO.GELATO.GELATO.GELATO.GELATO.

Does this surprise you?

So thank goodness,

There was a beach!!!

5 minute walk from our hotel:)

mmm...sunshine...

beautiful beach.

What more could you ask for?

Hey, hold up.

You don't even need to get up, clean the sand off of ya, and go to a shopping mall..

the stores come to you:)

whaaa???

minus the fact that their all from mexico.

Do they think we are stupid and really believe they are selling couture clothing?

Ah, we were getting soooo excited for a peaceful, perfect day at the beach..

mmhhm..

all smiles..

untill...

ten minutes before this photo was snapped.

2 men, age 40, age 20,

saunter on over to us as we bask in the heat of the day,

sit down,

start speaking italian,

and getting very, very close to us.

40 year old sat next to me, he asked where I was from, I say U.S, he say Italy, he then asked my name, I told him Nikki, thinking, okay, Nicolette is a little rough to say for a foreigner, i'll give him my easy name.

Nope. Didn't help, dumb guy kept calling me Gichy Gichy.

your kidding right?

So 20 year old is keeping a fair distance from Carly but making friendly conversation. He spoke better english than 40 year old creep a**.

What they were wearing?...20 year old was wearing a saggy red speedo. 40 year old was wearing semi see through tiny white shorts.

Lets also mention that he had a blob of un rubbed in sun block sitting on his nose. gross

All of a sudden 40 year old starts trying to rub my leg.

carly turned around in perfect timing and slapped his hand away saying "NO"

If that didn't scare him enough ( i mean come on, who wouldn't be scared of carly after she did that?)

He asks if he can kiss me!!!?

I say no no no, we don't kiss, we don't kiss.

Stupid 40 yr. old then reverts to kissing my leg? ..My LEG??!

Continually saying "ooo, gichy gitchy, bella bella,,,ooo so beautiul.."

I was actually getting freaked out at this point and started saying "well we need to go find our mom and dad!"

We start standing up, and creep leans in to hug me.

I'm thinkin, okay, better than him leaning in for a kiss, i'll hug and run.

Nope, thought too soon.

He hugged me, then squezzed me close to him and started kissing my cheek, neck, shoulder, arm, then let go and french kissed my effing hand!!!!!!!!

I thought i was getting raped.

I just kept repeating "NO NO NO NO NO NO NO"

oh my hell...so so, so! scary.

Who does that?

Beware of creepy creepy 40 year old virgins, on beaches in Venice.

Scariest day of my life.

After a horrible encounter with creepy men, we start searching for a new spot to lay out, a spot where there are plenty of people...along the way, we met sand woman.

Carly, literally thought she was real?

I mean that does look pretty legit yeah?

We went up to it,

poked it,

just to check ya know?

then stole some sea shells:)

Carly was feeling a little left out, since I got raped. ..For some reason she thought that touching the fake sand woman would satisfy her urge.

Ah, finally safe at last. No more innapropriate moments...ready to relax and enjoy our first day in Venice.

mmm...nope. When in rains it poures.

And i mean poures!!!

Some of the most interesting people in the world, keep in mind these next few pictures were literally taken in a matter of 10 minutes. Bad things just kept on coming.

Only in Venice.

scene number 1.

This is a shout out to my niece Kate.

You started this trend, and girl, look what you've done? Their doin it all across the globe now?

You rock:)

mm..gotta love butt crack on beach

plus, you assume she probably ate her clothes.

you have to feel bad a little.

Its not her fault that she was naked,

she got hungry,

a girls gotta eat.

boys boys boys....for some reason it was so humorous for these young bucks to roll around in the sand, get it up their butt crack, nose, and mouth, jump in the ocean, and do it all again.

Bryson and Brad...you belong here. May you please take your european swimsuits to Europe? I promise you will fit in.

EVERYONE. wore the nastiest speedos.

Then, to add to it, they'd play futbol like this, and run, and jump, and ...you know what i'm sayin.

Grosssss!!!!

Especially when they don't even fit!

come on,

may i also mention that women would lay on the sand, swimsuit bottoms on, no swimsuit top on .

letting their pasty white boobs burn!!!

I took a picture of some,

then realized that was so wrong of me.

ha ha oh dear.

Meet Fabio.

And his soul mate Helga behind him.

Just having a gay old time on the beach, on his cell phone....

AND! OPENLY ITCHING HIS JEWELS!

come on people!!

ha ha ha,

lets think before we do!

This city is just full of all sorts of sexuality. Even the over weight statues!

Smoochy smoochy!

ICE! We got ICE! After a horrible, graphic, rated "R" day, we got ICE! ah:)

So, we get ice.

Cool cool,

We're happy.

Then Ralphy, (man in the back, blue pants, resembles a turtle), decides to get mad at me and carly becuase we don't want to eat the freakin plastic noodles they gave us.

Called us picky eaters.

You don't do that with this family.

Carly was not happy.